Breaking News

I already told you guys that I have this Kick Ass exam in about 2 weeks.
I arrived on Sunday from Australia and from then on, I was studying every day for 5-8 hours in the library. I did  good progress but it still wasn't enough to pass this Test.


Most worried I was about the Accounting and the French part.


Today something unexpectedly and unbelievable happen.
I was sitting in the Law Library of the University of Bern (I like to act like a law student).
I was learning this accounting crap of which I already dreamed about because I've seen it so often this week. As I was reading the part about taxes, I got an message of my brother.
He told me that today it came a letter of the school I had applied for. 
(First I was angry about why this asshole opened my letter)
He told me that they wrote I got a free access.
Which means I don't have to write the exam =)


I am so happy, because I already thought about negotiating with the principal about having more time for the test and then this..


I am so happy, this was so unexpectedly I was already thinking about cleaning my rifle for army. 


My friends still don't know about it (actually they will.. as soon as I press "publishing post") but I wont tell them.. Okay not all of them.


Oh and of course I will continue studying because this school is not easy and I'd like to have a good mark.


Thank you Mrs. Schwaller for this letter, I love you ;)
Thank you friends for believing in me!


Oh and good luck for those of you, who still have to do it =)


Cheers

Plan B!

It happened..
shit happened..


Today it's the first time I don't know what to write..
Normally I take my notebook click "new post" and start to write today I got stuck for about 4 minutes.. 4 minutes is far to long to think about what to write.


Why does this happen to me? I really don't know but then I started to realize..
..I'm back home and.. it's boring!


I spend hours with studying everyday did a little workout on Tuesday but my muscles still hurt.
Oh and probably the most interesting part..


It started to snow again! =)
It's so beautiful watch the white magic outside until... you go out.. it's cold and windy.
Your hair get wet after it took you hours to style them.. (For most people not for me, I wake up every morning with the ideal hairstyle for the day, sometime it even changes during the day)


But because of my exams I can't even think about snowboarding..
What happens if I wouldn't pass and believe me this could really be the case, because I have no Idea about this stuff anymore.


So I made up my Plan B! 
In the case I don't pass I'll apply for the special forces of swiss army.
Don't ask me why, I still can't answer it for me, it's just ..


I think it might be interesting to try.
out of 400 applicants the chose 8 every year (I still think it's a lie, there are not even 400 guys in swiss army..)


They already send me the forms to fill out and they're really intelligent, after you found out what you have to do for the physical test, you're scared, but they send you a sheet on which you can see the payment..
to be honest you get good money even during the 18 months instruction.


What you have to do is this:
at least..
50 push-ups in 2 minutes without stopping
60 sit-ups in 2 minutes without stopping
10 chin-ups in 2 minutes without stopping
5 kilometers in less than 24 minutes
8 kilometers and 15 kilogram on your back in less than 58 minutes
25 kilometers and 25 kilogram on your back in less than 3.5 hours
300m swimming in less than 10 minutes


this is really hard.. for most people.. but not for me I do this with a blindfold.


You see, I do care about my future and do plan it.
Yeah I know I always boast, that I'm spontaneous and stuff but hey, it's about money making so you're allowed to plan.


Cheers

Wilson's Revenge

I know what you're waiting for!

You still want to see the person I wrote the most about..

Yes.. Me! 

But today I got a special! Today I'm gonna show you a clip of me AND Wilson!

Of course you remember Wilson the bored crow. Which really attacks you while cycling (maybe he's jealous).

Yes I recorded it and here I need to say, it's pretty difficult to manage a camera, cycling and look after a crow but I as a multitasked machine can handle this without any problems.. (I almost fell..)

So this video is just a prove it's not funny or something (it's not meant to be funny) normally this crow attacks you 2-3 times this day he came just once.

Oh and before you watch the video.. please don't take any note of the singing part, it was just to make him angry.

enjoy

Cheers

Chloe's graduation speech

Hello my friends and strangers 

As you now I was not able to upload my videos in Australia, but now as I'm back I'd like to share my experience with you.

Now, do you remember how I told you about the graduation speeches? And do you remember about the japanese people speaking and nobody understands?

I made a video of one of them graduating. Don't get this in a wrong way, Chloe (we really don't know what's her real name) really improved her english (I guess) it's just.. she's so funny when she speaks unclearly into the microphone =)

enjoy the movie!

Langports Studios presents..

in association with Paradise Pictures..

Directed by Ardi

Executive Direction by Adam the Principal

Sound by Joe

Casting by Nici from reception

Staring: Chloe as Chloe 

Barbara as the teacher

Statists as Students

(Parental control, this movie might contain scenes of violence and sex. 

Please make sure this clip is not being watched by underaged)

Cheers

Back in Town

Freeze..
That's the first thing I discovered after I arrived in Zürich.
Before I even went to get my luggage, I walked straight into the next restroom to change.
Instead of tongues I wore shoes AND socks!
Instead of shorts Jeans, long ones of course!
instead of a t-shirt.. well actually I've still worn a t-shirt but over this 3 more things..


To get out of the airport I had to take the train, for those who have never been in the airport train in Zürich, it's a must! You'll hear people singing in native style and there it was, my first "grüezi" which means "hi" in swiss despite it came through the speakers I was happy =)


Panic came over me as I was waiting for my stuff.
"If you see a red, embarrassing suitcase, it's mine." I told Krista.
I couldn't tell here that my suitcase is actually purple, that would be even more embarrassing. 
I was worried if my suitcase went instead to Singapore..


Finally it arrived and I went through to the exit, where I found immediately the white smiling faces which were waiting for me =)
Carrying this big  sign with my name on it, there were waiting about 46 people of whom I knew only the half, the other half were some bored gangsters from the ghetto Spreitenbach which didn't know what else to do.
On one sign there was even Oprah's name.. did he expect Oprah is coming with me? Poor idiot? She's coming in a few weeks... not!


My people were so surprised I still knew how to speak german.. of course I do, in Surfers there were even more Swiss than in my neighborhood (and the worst part.. it's true!)
Back in Swissyland (I call it Swissyland because Rob used to call it this way -> wherever he is) we went to eat. guess where.. Mc'Donalds.. yeah, but at least I paid with swiss money.. actually my friend paid because haven't been at the "ATM" yet.. I'm such an asshole.. 


Even my cousin came to see me at the airport, he looks like usual, dressed weird but he doesn't care :D 
Then we went for a coffee and guess where.. right Starbucks.. I came to Switzerland for the same shit I had over there..
After that we went to my place, it was so unusual to drive on the right side of the street =) I was sitting in front and all 4 minutes I looked back to my friends and smiled because I was happy.. I love you people!


Finally we arrived home with all 54 people (right we picked up another 8). I was so surprised when I saw my brothers taller than before, my younger bro was always a midget but now he reached the level of the Lonney Tunes. my youngest brother was as tall as me when I left and I'm already tall but now he is even 4 cm taller than me, so he's 212 cm now.. kidding!


Some of the gangsters of Spreitenbach slept in my place 'cause they missed the train back home and we did Pasta together.. like I had not enough Pasta in Australia.. but my mom is still in Canada so I couldn't enjoy yet her meals.


Although I went to bed at 1 a.m. I woke up 5 and a half hours later.. hello where are we.. in army? So I washed the dishes and went to the library to study for my test. I was not even that bad but still got to learn a lot. 


All the people look at me like I'm a weirdo, I know I am, but they didn't look at me like this before. Maybe it's strange for them seeing someone tanned in this time.. they're just jealous but another 3 days and I'm sure I'm gonna be as white as them.. 


I'm really disappointed because there is no snow. "Be happy" would most people say, but I'm not! I'd like to go snowboarding and this seems only possible on my xbox 360..


Swiss sucks!


Cheers

Bubble Australia

I'm sitting now in Dubai at gate 221 and waiting for my flight back home.
2 hours until boarding..
I just had a 14 hours flight next to me there was a huge black guy, imagine an NFL Full Guard with a weight of 250 pounds. This guy next to me was for sure his older brother.


As I'm sitting here, I'm thinking about the time I had, the people I met and the experience I made.
In all this time I've been there, I never felt like home. I mean of course you get used to it, but I felt always like in vacation.


Lucky me, I'm flying with Krista back home, poor Krista got to work tomorrow, she asked me while we were driving to the airport, what is my gratest experience I had in Australia. I thought a lot about it but can't define one thing. There were so many and all of them were connected.
Experiences such as surfing and the sea you won't forget, but also little things like, swimming by rain in the lake on Fraser Island, eat pancakes on a sunday morning, watching the sunrise after clubbing, even all the animals I've seen.. moments like this will last forever.


I would like to say thank you for several things:


Thanks..
..Army, for giving me the money which allowed me to come over here.
..Daniela's, for having me in your house.
..Prolinguis and especially Gabriela for organizing my trip.
..to all the people I met here with whom I had a lot of fun.
..to all my beloved in Switzerland and Canada for keeping the contact and missing me.
..Ripcurl, for your rashie which made it possible for me to learn how to surf.
.."Nu" mineral spring water, without you I had survived my school days.
..Enzo, for cutting my hair.
..Blogger, for writing on you all my nonsense.


As I already said here it's not like home or let's say it this way, Surfers is not real.
Susie had the best expression for this, she used to say: Bubble Australia.
After the bubble bursts, real life starts again.
What does it mean for me? Back into real life I have 20 days to learn for my exams it's gonna be tough because I've to learn something I knew 2 years ago.
Of course I'll continue writing to not let you getting bored.
Susie asked me on my last day, what I learned.
the whole flight I was thinking about this question, and I'm still thinking..


Cheers

Mysterious Graduation

After an 11 weeks course I finally reached the day of my graduation.

But the circumstances of this day were different than all the other graduations I’ve seen.

1 Day before I left school it all started..

It was a usual day at Langports, everything was how it’s supposed to be.

My teacher Rob brought a box to school with which we probably should practise the oral speaking test of the CAE test, why I know this? It was written on it and he asked me what I’d like to do on my last week and I said: speaking.

By then I couldn’t know that we would never see what’s inside...

We had the usual break but then it started. Rachel told us through the speakers that we would have 10 more minutes of break which I’ve never seen before in all my almost 3 months at surfers.

I knew something is wrong.

After break I saw Rachel instead of Rob standing in my classroom she wanted to be funny and said “I’m the new Rob”.. Nobody laughed..

Then she told us Rob is in a meeting, I knew she’s lying so the following Conversation started:

A: “Where is Rob really?”

R: “In a meeting as I already said”

A: “No he’s not”

R: “How could you know?”

A: “Lady, my Job in army was to find information in several ways, I’ve been taught to how to find the truth and a lie and I was good in my Job, your body language is contrasting so tell us the truth NOW!”

R: “Well.. that’s interesting.. but..”

A: “BUT WHAT?”

R: “Nothing..”

A: “NOTHING, WHAT?”

R: “Nothing, SIR, I’m just not allowed to speak about it, SIR”

A: “Proceed”

I had to let her go..

So we had class with Rachel, don’t get this in a wrong way I like her but.. okay that’s a lie I don’t like her, I just say I like her because she’s really hot for her age. When a student asks her something difficult, you can see how she gets confused and then she takes a big breath just to make her breast even bigger, just to confuse you.

Anyway in the evening somebody told me that Rob quit nobody knows why.. First I thought this was a joke but then I started to realise it could be possible. Something must have happened during the break.

Next day I came late to school, it was my last day so I didn’t care. I wanted to go and check my mails but I passed next to my classroom to see if Rob was there. Jo was sitting on the teacher’s chair when she saw me she asked me in.

Polite like I am I went in. although I knew, I asked her where Rob is, she told me that he quit but couldn’t tell me why. I was worried, I’m so curious that I have to know what happened.

Later that day I had my graduation speech. I was so cool, not a little nervous like I’m used to it standing on a stage, but who would say something about me when Rob was not there? I hoped Marc, He was me teacher in my first 5 weeks.

Then my name was called..

Marc was standing there, he gave me my certificate, 98% of attendance.. holy shit!

He said I improved very well, my English is incredible and that he sent me just after a few weeks into level 6. I did exceptionally well, congratulations and all the best.

Then we hugged..

It was not one of these gay hugs you know.. It was a male hug!

My speech.. I remember everything but I really didn’t plan what to say.

“Wow so many people here.. (Laugh) my Mom always told me that if I’m nervous I should just imagine all the people in underwear..(Laugh) let’s try.. (Close my eyes.. open them..) Sexy! (Big Laugh)!

(At this point I would like to mention my graduation picture, it was a Kangaroo but he looked really stoned! I shot this picture by my own)

Yeah and by the way this picture.. it’s me after my first Brazilian party (Laugh)

To be honest, I think the most boring part of the school are the graduation speeches, because it’s always the same.. Students say tendentiously 7 to 10 times thank you, 1 out of 3 mentions either Brazilian party or Surf club etc (Laugh).

So I would like to change this today.. Instead of saying thank you I would like to say.. you’re welcome.. (Huge Laugh)

You’re Welcome Rob, wherever you are, and Marc for having me in your class, (laugh) you’re welcome Rebecca for giving me my first warning in my first week for not speaking English in school, you’re welcome Chris for being your favourite library student and you’re welcome students for having fun with me. (Huge Laugh)

You’re welcome Langports!”

Actually there was some more, but I can’t tell you! First of all you wouldn’t believe it and second, you need to know the whole context to get this, but you wouldn’t believe the whole context so let’s keep it like this.

I just say.. I’m a legend in school now.

In the end, I had a standing ovation, people were crying and begging me to stay.

Even in Adam's, my principal, eyes I've seen a tear.

Thanks for everything you're welcome and have fun!

Cheers